How to Know If You Are in a Healthy Relationship

Relationships are rarely flawless; they’re a blend of both healthy and unhealthy elements. Yet, while we often discuss the warning signs of unhealthy relationships, we tend to overlook what defines a healthy one. Healthy relationships thrive on respect, trust, honest communication, and mutual support. Shifting our focus to these positive aspects helps us cultivate stronger, more meaningful connections.

To evaluate the health of your relationship, consider asking yourself questions like these:

  • Do you have trust in one another?
  • Do you respect each other?
  • Do you support each other’s interests and efforts?
  • Are you honest and open with each other?
  • Are you able to maintain your individual identity?
  • Do you talk about your feelings, hopes, fears, and dreams?
  • Do you feel and express fondness and affection?
  • Is there equality and fairness in your relationship?

Characteristics of Healthy Relationships

  • Trust
    Trust forms the foundation of any healthy relationship, built through mutual respect, dependability, and honest interactions over time.
  • Openness and Self-Disclosure
    Sharing thoughts, feelings, and experiences fosters connection and strengthens trust, while also respecting each other’s boundaries.
  • Healthy Boundaries
    Boundaries protect individuality and ensure mutual respect by defining acceptable behaviors and maintaining personal space and needs.
  • Mutual Respect
    Healthy relationships thrive on respect, shown through active listening, understanding, and supporting each other’s goals and individuality.
  • Love and Affection
    Genuine love evolves from passion to deep affection and trust, with each partner finding contentment in their shared emotional and physical connection.
  • Good Communication
    Open, respectful communication allows couples to resolve conflicts constructively and strengthen their bond.
  • Give-and-Take
    Reciprocity in relationships means giving and receiving support freely, balancing needs while nurturing each other.

Building a healthy relationship requires a balance of trust, respect, open communication, and mutual support. By fostering openness, setting healthy boundaries, and embracing love and affection, partners can create a nurturing connection that grows over time. Effective communication and a natural give-and-take ensure that both individuals feel valued and supported, even through challenges. While no relationship is perfect, focusing on these key elements can help strengthen your bond and pave the way for a fulfilling and lasting partnership.

Reference: https://www.verywellmind.com/all-about-healthy-relationship-4774802

Narratives of Healing: How Our Elders Guide Us Beyond Borders

As a Black Buddhist who grew up studying Buddhism, classical Chinese music, and the art of Japanese Bonsai, I’ve often reflected on what it means to embrace traditions that are not rooted in my ancestry. At first, I felt like an outsider, but as I listened to the stories of my elders, I began to see that expression isn’t confined to bloodlines or geography. These stories with struggle, resilience, and love—are more than personal memories; they are bridges. They connect us to our roots, to our shared humanity, and to a deeper understanding of who we are. Listening to our elders allows us to step beyond limits, and into the universal truths that bind us all.

Our elders carry within them the echoes of countless generations, each story a thread in the fabric of our collective being. When I sat with my grandparents and listened to their stories of living in the south, the KKK, the fight for freedom, perseverance, and triumph, I realized these narratives were not just about them—they were about me, too. Their resilience became a lens through which I could make sense of my bicultural journey, blending my own me-ness with diverse philosophies and arts. The wisdom of our elders reminds us that culture is not a static inheritance but a living and breathing dialogue. By honoring their experiences, we create space for healing and understanding, for ourselves and for the communities we touch.

In Buddhism, we often speak of transcending the conventional world, but this does not mean abandoning it—it means transforming it. The stories of our elders are vehicles for that transformation. They teach us compassion, resilience, and interconnectedness, serving as a guide for navigating life’s complexities. When we take the time to listen deeply, we honor their sacrifices and create a legacy of healing for future generations. Their wisdom invites us to bridge divides, to embrace diversity, and to build communities rooted in love and understanding. In this way, the stories of the past become seeds of a more harmonious future.

Jarrelle ( Jie ao ) Barton

Asthma and Secondhand Smoke

Asthma is a chronic disease that affects the airways in the lungs, causing them to swell and narrow during an asthma attack, which makes breathing difficult. This swelling reduces the flow of air in and out of the lungs, and the cells in the airways may produce excess mucus—a thick, sticky substance—that further obstructs airflow and exacerbates breathing challenges. If you have asthma, an attack can occur when something irritates your airways and triggers symptoms, which can vary from person to person. Tobacco smoke, including secondhand smoke, is a common trigger and is particularly harmful to individuals with asthma, though it is unhealthy for everyone.

Symptoms of an asthma attack may include:

  • Coughing
  • Shortness of breath or trouble breathing
  • Wheezing
  • Tightness or pain in the chest

Secondhand smoke consists of a combination of gases and fine particles, including:

  • Smoke from burning tobacco products, such as cigarettes, cigars, or pipes
  • Smoke that has been exhaled (breathed out) by someone who smokes

To reduce the risk of asthma attacks, it is crucial to identify and avoid personal triggers, such as tobacco smoke, which is not only harmful to individuals with asthma but also to everyone exposed to it. Preventative measures include maintaining a smoke-free environment, minimizing exposure to pollutants, and following a treatment plan prescribed by a healthcare provider. Quitting smoking is one of the most effective ways to protect your health and the health of those around you, especially children and individuals with asthma. By making these changes, you can create a healthier, safer space for everyone while managing asthma more effectively.

**Studies show that flavors such as fruit, candy, and menthol are particularly appealing to adolescents.**

Reference: https://www.cdc.gov/tobacco/campaign/tips/diseases/secondhand-smoke-asthma.html

Know the Effects, Risks and Side Effects of Marijuana

Marijuana use carries significant risks that can impact a person’s health and life, yet its use continues to rise, especially among all adult age groups, both sexes, and pregnant women. In the U.S., marijuana is the most commonly used illegal substance, and despite growing usage, the perception of its potential harm is declining. Many young people today do not view marijuana use as risky. However, the dangers are very real, particularly for youth, young adults, and pregnant or nursing women. Today’s marijuana is stronger than ever, and addiction to it is a genuine concern.

Marijuana Risks

Marijuana use can lead to negative and lasting effects:

Brain health: Marijuana can cause permanent IQ loss of as much as 8 points when people start using it at a young age. These IQ points do not come back, even after quitting marijuana.

Mental health: Studies link marijuana use to depression, anxiety, suicide planning, and psychotic episodes. It is not known, however, if marijuana use is the cause of these conditions.

Athletic Performance: Research shows that marijuana affects timing, movement, and coordination, which can harm athletic performance.

Driving: People who drive under the influence of marijuana can experience dangerous effects: slower reactions, lane weaving, decreased coordination, and difficulty reacting to signals and sounds on the road.

Baby’s health and development: Marijuana use during pregnancy may cause fetal growth restriction, premature birth, stillbirth, and problems with brain development, resulting in hyperactivity and poor cognitive function. Tetrahydrocannabinol (THC) and other chemicals from marijuana can also be passed from a mother to her baby through breast milk, further impacting a child’s healthy development.

Daily life: Using marijuana can affect performance and how well people do in life. Research shows that people who use marijuana are more likely to have relationship problems, worse educational outcomes, lower career achievement, and reduced life satisfaction.

In conclusion, it’s important to recognize that marijuana is addictive, contrary to the common belief that it’s harmless. Research shows that 1 in 6 people who start using marijuana before the age of 18 can become addicted, and 1 in 10 adults who use it face the same risk. Over the years, the potency of marijuana has significantly increased, with today’s marijuana containing three times the THC concentration compared to 25 years ago. The higher the THC content, the more intense the effects on the brain, likely contributing to the rise in marijuana-related emergency room visits. While the long-term risks of higher potency marijuana are still being studied, it’s clear that increased THC levels likely lead to higher rates of dependency and addiction. Understanding these risks is crucial for making informed decisions about marijuana use.

Reference: https://www.samhsa.gov/substance-use/learn/marijuana/risks

Can You Have a Delayed Reaction to Grief?

Grief typically unfolds through five stages: denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance. While it begins with denial and ends with acceptance, the journey is rarely linear. According to San Francisco therapist Dr. Avigail Lev, individuals often move back and forth between stages—shifting from anger to bargaining, returning to depression, and so on. These stages provide a framework for processing loss, confronting emotions, and moving toward healing. However, in delayed grief, denial persists, leaving unresolved feelings that can complicate the path to recovery.

“In delayed grieving, the denial stage lasts longer, meaning the person remains in denial for a more extended period.” — Dr. Avigail Lev

Signs and Symptoms of Delayed Grief

Delayed grief varies from person to person, with symptoms that can manifest both emotionally and physically. Signs of delayed grief on an emotional level include:

  • A sense of numbness or detachment
  • Intense emotional reactions in response to things that remind you of the loss
  • Feelings of persistent sadness
  • Intrusive thoughts or memories about your loved one
  • Problem enjoying things that used to bring you pleasure
  • Changes in how you feel about yourself, your purpose, or your identity
  • Feelings of guilt or regret

Physical symptoms of delayed grief can include:

  • Changes in sleep, appetite, or body weight
  • Feeling tired or unmotivated
  • Physical symptoms such as headaches, stomach aches, muscle tension, frequent illness, and digestive issues

Self-Care Practices to Support the Grieving Process

If you’re dealing with delayed grief, there are strategies to help you reconnect with your emotions and process them more deeply. Consider trying the following techniques:

  • Journaling: Expressive writing can be a therapeutic way to work through the difficult emotions you are feeling. Consider writing a letter to your loved one or write down your favorite memories of that person.
  • Mindfulness practices: Mindfulness is all about centering your attention on the here and now. It can be a way to connect with what you are feeling and what these feelings mean. Research suggests it can help bereaved people improve emotional regulation and executive function.
  • Stick to a routine: Keeping a regular routine is important when you are dealing with stressful experiences. It can help you maintain a sense of consistency and normalcy, which may help you feel more in control even when things seem hectic or tumultuous.
  • Learn about grief: Spend some time learning about what the normal grieving process looks like, including the stages of grief that people typically experience. It can be comforting to know that what you are experiencing is normal and expected.
  • Honor your loved one: Find meaningful ways to honor the memory of the person you have lost. For example, you might create a memorial or participate in rituals to honor their life.

Healing from grief, especially delayed grief, takes time and patience, but it’s important to know that support and effective treatment options are available. Strategies like grief counseling, cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT), mindfulness-based stress reduction (MBSR), and expressive arts therapy can help you process your emotions, reconnect with your feelings, and navigate your journey toward acceptance. Whether through talking, mindfulness, creative expression, or structured therapeutic approaches, these options provide valuable tools to address your grief and move forward with greater clarity and resilience.

Reference: https://www.verywellmind.com/can-you-have-a-delayed-reaction-to-grief-8425426

What are the physical health consequences of tobacco use?

Cigarette smoking harms nearly every organ in the body and remains the leading preventable cause of premature death in the United States, contributing to an estimated 480,000 deaths annually. Smokers aged 60 and older face a twofold increase in mortality compared to nonsmokers, dying approximately six years earlier. While nicotine itself is not carcinogenic, tobacco smoke contains at least 69 cancer-causing chemicals, making smoking responsible for at least 30% of all cancer deaths. Overall cancer death rates are twice as high among smokers as nonsmokers, with heavy smokers having a fourfold greater risk. Quitting smoking yields immediate health benefits, and depending on the age of cessation, some or all of the reduced life expectancy can be regained.

Key Factors:

  1. Cancer Risks:
    • Lung cancer: Smoking is linked to 80–90% of cases and 80% of deaths.
    • Other cancers: Mouth, pharynx, larynx, esophagus, stomach, pancreas, cervix, kidney, bladder, acute myeloid leukemia.
    • Smokeless tobacco: Associated with cancers of the pharynx, esophagus, stomach, lung, and colorectal cancer.
  2. Lung Diseases:
    • Chronic bronchitis and emphysema.
    • Worsened asthma symptoms in adults and children.
    • Leading risk factor for chronic obstructive pulmonary disease (COPD), which is irreversible once developed.
  3. Heart Disease:
    • Increases risk of stroke, heart attack, vascular disease, and aneurysm.
    • Responsible for 40% of smoking-related deaths.
    • Causes coronary heart disease, the leading cause of death in the U.S.
  4. Other Health Conditions:
    • Rheumatoid arthritis, inflammation, impaired immune function.
    • Reduced health-related quality of life in young smokers aged 26–41.
    • Potential link to Type 2 Diabetes through pathways between the pancreas and brain.
  5. Benefits of Quitting:
    • Lung damage repair over time (except in COPD).
    • Improved overall health and reduced risk of smoking-related diseases.



The devastating impact of smoking on nearly every aspect of health—causing cancers, lung diseases, heart conditions, and a host of other ailments—underscores the urgent need to quit. While the damage caused by smoking is significant, the good news is that quitting can lead to remarkable health benefits, including the repair of lung damage, improved quality of life, and a lower risk of life-threatening diseases. Whether you’re a long-term smoker or have recently started, it’s never too late to take the first step toward a healthier future. Seek support from loved ones, healthcare professionals, or smoking cessation programs to embark on this life-changing journey. Quitting smoking not only adds years to your life but also greatly improves the quality of those years—an investment in your well-being and the peace of mind of those who care about you.

**By prioritizing the health and safety of its young residents, Minnesota is investing in a brighter, healthier future for all.**

Reference: https://nida.nih.gov/publications/research-reports/tobacco-nicotine-e-cigarettes/what-are-physical-health-consequences-tobacco-use

10 Sneaky Signs Stress Is Showing Up in Your Body

You’re probably familiar with the word stress, but you might not have heard of overstress. The American Psychological Association (APA) defines stress as the physical and emotional reactions to challenges or stressors. This can manifest as physical symptoms like a racing heart or emotional responses like irritability (more on that shortly). Stress is an unavoidable part of life—it’s simply part of being human. The real issue arises when stress crosses the line into overstress. Though less commonly discussed, overstress is essentially chronic stress. The APA describes chronic stress as the ongoing physical and emotional toll caused by prolonged exposure to stressful situations.

” Stress v. Overstress

Think of it like this: cramming for finals is stressful. But it only happens a couple of times a year. However, working a high-pressure job with constant quick and intense deadlines can lead to chronic stress. You’re having prolonged exposure to stressful events, which can leave you feeling overstressed.” – Verywell Mind

What Causes Overstress?

Stressful Circumstances

  • Chronic illness
  • Job loss
  • Spousal conflict
  • Mental health challenges
  • Family difficulties

Uncertainty and Unpredictability

  • Adding layers of stress to everyday challenges.

Sustained Stress

  • Persistently pushing through stressful events or situations over an extended period.

Understanding the factors that lead to overstress can help you recognize when your stress levels are becoming unmanageable. If you’re navigating ongoing challenges like health issues, relationship conflicts, or prolonged uncertainty, it’s important to acknowledge the toll they may take. Remember, you don’t have to face it alone—seeking support from a therapist, counselor, or trusted professional can make a world of difference. Taking steps to address your well-being is not a sign of weakness but an act of strength and self-care.

Reference: https://www.verywellmind.com/signs-of-overstress-8738715

Office on Smoking and Health (OSH)

Tobacco use remains the leading cause of preventable illness, disability, and death in the United States. As of 2021, approximately 28.3 million U.S. adults smoke cigarettes, with over 16 million living with at least one smoking-related disease. Additionally, 58 million nonsmokers are exposed to secondhand smoke. The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) leads national efforts to reduce tobacco-related deaths and chronic diseases. Through partnerships and tobacco control initiatives, the CDC focuses on:

  • Preventing youth from starting tobacco use.
  • Promoting smoke-free environments.
  • Expanding programs to support quitting tobacco.
  • Addressing tobacco-related health disparities across diverse populations.



The Office on Smoking and Health (OSH) leads strategic public health efforts to end commercial tobacco use and exposure, striving to provide equitable opportunities for all communities to live free from the disease, disability, death, and social and economic impacts caused by tobacco products. Guided by a vision of a world free from commercial tobacco-related harm, OSH focuses on preventing tobacco use among youth and young adults, promoting quitting, eliminating secondhand smoke exposure, and advancing health equity by addressing tobacco-related disparities. In collaboration with local, state, national, and international partners, OSH expands the science of effective tobacco control, builds sustainable infrastructure for comprehensive programs, communicates timely information to stakeholders, and coordinates policies and strategic initiatives, while fostering global tobacco control through surveillance, capacity building, and knowledge sharing.

Key Activities
The CDC collaborates with decision-makers, partners, health officials, and the public to combat the tobacco epidemic by:

  • Supporting tobacco cessation and quitline services in 50 states, 2 territories, and Washington, D.C., and maintaining the national network of tobacco cessation quitlines.
  • Educating the public about the harms of tobacco use, including through paid media campaigns like Tips From Former Smokers.
  • Conducting and coordinating surveillance, laboratory, and evaluation activities related to tobacco use and its effect on health.
  • Reducing tobacco-related health disparities through 8 national networks working to reduce tobacco use among specific populations.
  • Supporting health systems to improve cessation insurance coverage, remove barriers to evidence-based cessation treatments, and promote use of covered treatments.

Through collaborative efforts with decision-makers, partners, health officials, and the public, the CDC remains steadfast in its mission to end the tobacco epidemic. By advancing science, building sustainable infrastructure, implementing effective policies, and addressing health disparities, the CDC is paving the way for a healthier, tobacco-free future. Together, these actions are critical to protecting lives, promoting health equity, and creating communities free from the devastating impacts of commercial tobacco use and exposure.

**By prioritizing the health and safety of its young residents, Minnesota is investing in a brighter, healthier future for all.**

Reference: https://www.cdc.gov/tobacco/programs/index.html

Marijuana and Lung Health

Marijuana is the most commonly abused drug, with its health effects largely determined by how it’s consumed. It can be smoked using pipes, bongs, joints, blunts, and vaporizers or consumed through products like e-cigarettes, candy, brownies, beverages, and capsules. While this discussion centers on marijuana and lung health, it’s crucial to recognize other health concerns, such as neurological and cognitive effects, as well as public health issues like accidental pediatric poisonings from edible marijuana products. Smoke from marijuana combustion contains many of the same toxins, irritants, and carcinogens as tobacco smoke, posing potential harm to lung health. Although marijuana smoke is less carcinogenic than tobacco smoke, its toxins may still pose risks, particularly to vulnerable populations like children. More research is needed to fully understand the effects of secondhand marijuana smoke.

Key Facts on Lung Health and Marijuana Smoke

  1. Impact on Lung Health: Smoking marijuana damages the lungs, causing chronic bronchitis, injuring airway cell linings, and leading to chronic cough, phlegm production, wheeze, and acute bronchitis.
  2. Air Pocket and Air Bubble Risks: Heavy marijuana smoking has been linked to air pockets between the lungs and chest wall, as well as large air bubbles in the lungs, especially among young to middle-aged adults.
  3. Immune System Effects: Smoking marijuana suppresses the immune system, impairing the body’s ability to fight infections and potentially increasing the risk of lower respiratory tract infections.
  4. Defense Mechanisms: It reduces the lungs’ ability to defend against infections by killing cells that remove dust and germs and increasing mucus production.
  5. Radiographic Findings: Marijuana-only smokers exhibit greater airway thickening, inflammation, and emphysema compared to both nonsmokers and tobacco-only smokers.
  6. Opportunistic Infections: Marijuana smoking may heighten the risk of opportunistic infections and transmission of viral infections, particularly in individuals with weakened immune systems, such as those with HIV.
  7. Aspergillus Mold Exposure: Marijuana can harbor Aspergillus mold, which may cause lung disorders when smoked, though it rarely affects healthy individuals.
  8. Vaping and “Dabbing” Concerns: Limited research suggests that inhaling marijuana via vape pens or dabbing cannabis concentrates could pose similar respiratory health risks as e-cigarette use.

In light of the significant respiratory and immune system risks associated with smoking and inhaling marijuana, it’s essential to approach its use with caution, particularly for those with pre-existing health conditions or compromised immune systems. The damage to lung health, increased vulnerability to infections, and potential exposure to harmful molds underscore the need for further research and public awareness. As methods of consumption like vaping and dabbing grow in popularity, understanding their long-term effects becomes increasingly critical. Prioritizing health and making informed choices about marijuana use can help mitigate these risks and protect overall well-being.

Reference: https://www.lung.org/quit-smoking/smoking-facts/health-effects/marijuana-and-lung-health

The Hardships and Dreams of Asian Americans Living in Poverty

Without closely examining the diversity of Asian American experiences, it’s easy to miss the distinct stories of Asian Americans living with economic hardship. – Pew Research

Among the 24 million Asians in the U.S., around 2.3 million live in poverty, facing unique challenges in their pursuit of the American dream. From immigrants navigating language barriers to U.S.-born Asians striving for financial stability, the journey is far from easy. In February 2023, Pew Research Center held focus groups with adults from 11 Asian origin groups most likely to experience economic hardship. Participants, many earning near or below the federal poverty line, shared insights into their struggles and aspirations. Common themes included daily financial stress, stereotypes that Asians don’t need assistance, and a shared belief that financial security is key to achieving the American dream. These stories highlight the resilience and determination within Asian communities amid adversity.



Financial struggles are a significant part of life for many Asian Americans, as revealed in a 2022-23 survey. Participants were asked about challenges like relying on food banks, losing health insurance, struggling to pay rent or medical bills, and being unable to save for emergencies. Among Asian adults living near or below the poverty line, 79% reported experiencing at least one of these hardships in the past year, compared to 48% of those above the poverty line. The most common issue was the inability to save for emergencies, affecting 57% of those in poverty versus 40% of those with higher incomes.

Balancing family needs with limited income, focus group participants described the constant struggle of planning for the future. The pressure to provide for their children’s opportunities while securing their own retirement created a sense of urgency that shaped their financial decisions.

“I feel a bit helpless [about my financial situation]. … I don’t want to be in debt. I have to save money to raise my kids, but I don’t have money to save.”

–Immigrant man of Korean origin in early 30s (translated from Korean)

“[I save money] to go to Pakistan. Because I have four children … I needed five or six tickets, in case my husband traveled with us, and it required a lot of money. We used to save for one whole year, and when we were back from Pakistan, we were usually empty-handed. Then the cycle started again.”

–Immigrant woman of Pakistani origin in late 40s (translated from Urdu)

“You’re not going to work forever. No one is going to work forever. You want to have savings … for your rent [or] in case of medical bills [if] something happens. [You] might as well [save for] some trips down the while when you [can] travel still. But you’re not going to be working at 80 years old, are you?”

–U.S.-born man of Chinese origin in early 40s

For many, the American dream is intertwined with the concept of freedom—freedom from the weight of debt and the daily stress of meeting basic needs like rent and food, and freedom to make life choices without financial constraints. Despite economic hardships, hope persists. Among Asians living near or below the poverty line, half believe they are either on their way to achieving the American dream or have already reached it. This optimism contrasts with those above the poverty line, where a greater percentage report feeling closer to their dreams, underscoring the resilience and determination within these communities.

The pursuit of the American dream is deeply personal, yet it reflects a universal desire for stability, freedom, and opportunity. Despite the challenges of poverty, many remain hopeful, believing they are on a path toward a better future. This resilience speaks to the strength of individuals and communities striving to overcome obstacles and create lives of meaning and fulfillment. By addressing systemic barriers and supporting those in need, we can help ensure that the dream of freedom and opportunity becomes a reality for all.

Hope and determination can overcome any obstacle, lighting the path toward freedom and opportunity.

Kev cia siab thiab kev txiav txim siab tuaj yeem kov yeej txhua txoj kev nyuaj, teeb lub txoj kev mus rau kev ywj pheej thiab kev vam meej.

Reference:https://www.pewresearch.org/race-and-ethnicity/2024/03/27/the-hardships-and-dreams-of-asian-americans-living-in-poverty/?fbclid=IwZXh0bgNhZW0CMTAAAR3TXk5Eer_dUKl7vg2-NUBdmtL1CSu4WvsrpLPuSAoBnM1K_zF5NZGgQ3s_aem_afXkGhbcFLM5GZ9d-HRhPA